midwest guilt

it's been a while since i've posted (nearly 2 weeks!)..but i worked a lot after the fashion show was over (maybe too much). now i've had a couple of days off in a row which has allowed me to land back on earth. on my way back to earth, I purchased 2 awesome pairs of shoes, a couple of great summer dresses & made plans to fly to new york for a quick little trip on monday flying home on tuesday in time for work at 4pm.
this is so exciting and spontaneous and...stressful. funny. one of my new year's resolutions for 2007 was to travel more. i loooove to travel & I am currently in a place where i have the means & a flexible job...so, monday I'm going to ny, the week after to atlanta & the week after that i'll be in LA. good times, right? but oh do I ever feel guilty.
I was raised in a middle class family in the midwest. modesty was the motto, don't buy the name brand green beans, buy the store brand, they are the same after all & we'll save 10 cents.
At age 28, I am so intent on going against that ideal, sometimes I laugh at myself. No matter the cost, I have intense brand loyalty for shampoo, yogurt, milk, fresh basil, dish soap, apples. APPLES! Seriously. I don't know, maybe it's silly, but in some weird way, it kind of makes me feel like a bonafied adult or maybe it allows me to feel grounded..or maybe it just assures me I am not like my mother.
well, my mother's voice was ringing in my ears last night as I purchased my ticket to NY. I found myself grilling & questioning my reasoning for going and in some instances wondering if I was somehow shirking responsiblities or bills. for example:
is it necessary to go? no.
could you use the money in other ways? yes.
is your rent paid for may? yes.
for june? no.
well, you are going on two more trips in may...
ACH! Midwest guilt!
In the end, I remind myself that this was a new year's resolution. I don't have kids, I have the money, why not? This is the time to do spontaneous trips! By Sunday night I should be over the guilt & feel excited to be in the big apple..even if it is just for one night. xoxx

Hard Work Pays off

Even with a little bit of procrastination all of my work was done on time for Voltage Fashion Amplified 2007. The show was last night & went off without a hitch to a sold out crowd.




The above photo is of the Minneapolis band, The Plastic Constellations. Designing for them was my purpose in Voltage this year. Just in case you can't read their tees from L to R: I heart The Goods, I heart Danger, I Heart Dragons, I heart Spreadsheets.




In this photo are the Limited Edition Tees I designed & created to be sold as part of Fashion Weekend in conjunction with Voltage. From L to R: I heart Vinyl, I heart Sound, I Heart My Bike, I Heart Danger. To you Minneapolitans, the Tees are for sale at Cliche on 24th & Lyndale in Uptown. (Handsome models can be spotted at Fifth Element record store in Uptown.) xoxx

p.s. not enough visuals? go to myspace.com/reinvintaged & see a quick little video of the reinvintaged/TPC segment at Voltage 2007.

P is for Procrastination.

The first time heard of the word procrastinate I was about 9 or 10. My mom joking called me a procrastinator. I asked her what that meant & she said "It means that you put things off until the very last second." This was so very true of me at time & still is to this day.
At this moment, I have a plethora of things to do as my work is in a pretty big deal fashion show this coming wednesday. I feel good about where i'm at, but I'd feel better if I was working on it all right now.
But instead, I'm blogging.
If I wasn't blogging, I'd be surfing the internet.
If I wasn't surfing the internet, I'd be watching a movie I've seen a million & one times.
If I weren't doing that, well, I'd find something else that is not working on my designs to occupy me while I stress out in the back of my mind.
i'm good at it. Really good at justifying too. "I need to have a clean house in order to be productive," & then I'll spend 3 hours deep cleaning our kitchen. Or, "I do need to run to Target & get that one thing, I should do that first so it's out of the way" so i do that, but I also stop at my grandpa's, my aunt's, my mom's & maybe a high school friend, just cause I was in the neighborhood & it is a nice gesture to stop by and visit once in a while.
Try as I might, procrastinating is just a part of who I am & in many instances I do my best work in the wee hours of the morn' before a big deal event. So, i suppose it's better to embrace & laugh about it that to fight it.
In the meantime, there is some laundry to be done before I get back to work. xoxx.


P.S. For information on the "Big Deal Event" I've referenced in this post, go to http://www.voltagefashionamplified.com

The Legacy of the Centerpiece.

Last week I changed our dining room centerpiece from a collection of candles on a cake platter to several faux lemons & a few faux limes on a platter. I love it & it looks striking on our black dining room table. Handsome Randy has joked to me all week about us having a "12 Lemon Centerpiece" (sans the movie, The Break-Up).
So last night we're sitting at the dining room table talking & he picks up a lemon, tosses in the air & catches it. Then he pauses for a moment puzzled, "These aren't real?!"
"No."
He examines the lemon more carefully, "I thought they were real."
We then discussed how I actually made a trip to the hobby/craft store for the sole purpose of purchasing faux fruit for a dining room centerpiece. "I know it seems silly to some, but having a good centerpiece just makes me feel like our house is in some sort of order. I need it. I'm a Langer, that's how we are."
I said this in a joking manner, but it's no joke; it's serious bussiness.
I come from a long line of women who had & continue to have centerpieces that shift through out the year. Some more than others, but they are a necessity to us and we take pride in them.
My grandmother always had centerpieces on her dining room, kitchen, & coffee tables. The dining room & coffee table pieces were typically silk flowers arranged by my aunt Pal & were changed a couple of times per year, with the exception of christmas - there's always seperate centerpieces for christmas across the board (except at our house..putting up a tree is enough for me). On the center of my grandparents' kitchen table was always the same green acrylic bowl filled with plastic grapes & real fruit. This was a mainstay until they both passed away. On a recent trip to my aunt Stephanie's home, I saw the bowl (still filled with the same grapes) on her kitchen table. Seeing that my grandparents' fruit bowl centerpiece did not go in some box & into an attic after their deaths was somehow of comfort to me. That centerpiece, though it is just a centerpiece, represents a piece of life as it was before. It's nostalgia & it feels good to see.
My two cousins, who are 1 and 5 years older than me, consistantly have centerpieces on their tables too. Dining, coffee, kitchen, etc. One prefers variations of silk flowers with rocks or marbles, the other bamboo shoots in water or other crisp, zen like pieces.
My aunt Pal, who is now the matriarch of our family, is the most elaborate & well practiced with her centerpieces. There are many through out her home & most change seasonally. 4 in all: Kitchen table, Kitchen counter, Dining room table, Fireplace mantle & hearth. She has seperate centerpiece collections for easter, spring, summer, autumn, thanksgiving, christmas & just for inbetween. When one of my cousins was married last summer, Pal was left with a huge amount of pink mums from the reception centerpieces. She put them together in a huge bunch & threw them in an upside cake platter top & voila: the kitchen table centerpiece for the Post-Wedding brunch was done. It was so simple, yet so increidibly beautiful.
Pal is inspiration for us all & typically has not only great ideas & advice for our centerpieces, but has components that we can borrow or have if need be. For example, last night I was telling her of my plans for the centerpiece for our porch table come summer. It calls for river rock. "Okay. Now honey, don't buy any rocks, I have a bunch downstairs - you can just take what you want." Perfect, thank you.
And so, traveling to a craft/hobby store only to spend $16 on faux fruit may seem silly or frivelous to some. But for me you see, it's imperative to have that faux fruit in the center of my table & it is for the rest of the Langer women too. xoxx.